Hitting below the belt

I don't like how he brings out the best beast in me. And he does it really well. Its starting to take a lot more not to stoop to that level (of what i believe is immaturity, pettyness and stupidity)

extracted msn convo(20/4/09)-

him: she gets $25 not because she is being rude! She DOES NOT DESERVE IT! is this a better answer?
me: 1 last Q, can? so why doesn't she deserve it?
him: because she doesn't talk

I've learn that
1)muted friends actually have a voice, it's how you get them to voice out and how much patience you have to wait for the day they find their voice
2)no matter how diss one gets from have a muted friend, it doesn't beat one who talks to you when he needs something and starts shouting and staring at you, asking you to stop driving.
3)and gratefulness is indeed a 1 way street. You can get all the medical/work/immigration related things but still get screwed in the end.

cest'e la vie.

Recession splurge

Was reading my monthly dose of Details, and i came across this. Thought it quite true and made much sense.

Recession Splurge Reflex, an impulse to treat yourself to the very indulgences that we're all supposed to banish in the name of fiscal austerity.

Whatever it is, it can't be categorized as a necessity, which is exactly why you feel you deserve it. "Over time, Americans have become so accustomed to these small luxuries that we've stopped thinking of them as luxuries.They are now entitlements that we don't feel we should have to live without.

What you buy is no longer just a reflection of what you can buy. It's a narrative gesture about your identity—a public statement about who you are. "The way we express ourselves is through these purchasing decisions," says Anya Kamenetz, the author of Generation Debt. "Everything that you buy is coded to express your values. So if you can't buy the certain type of things that do that, then maybe you feel like you're giving up your values."

"There's a bulimic kind of quality to a lot of people's spending today," Kamenetz says. "People are imposing really Draconian restrictions on themselves, and after a week of bringing your sad little sandwich to work, you're like, 'Oh, fuck this—I'm going out for sushi.'" Especially when you just had to postpone that long-planned week in the Bahamas. Luxuriating in bites and baubles can serve as a psychic stopgap measure when you can't pay for a bathroom renovation.

Exs

Saying this more factually than anything else.

No matter how u think you're not/never going to hear about them. It's not true. So happens that a friend's friend i met actually is a good friend of my ex.

small world/community. So perhaps no surprises even there.

WA girl

3 things in a day, that's beyond coincidence.

1)was helping to take down a no and wadda know, it was her sg house number.

2)went clubbing and the guy involved was there, he was looking at a person similar in age and built to the incident a year ago at tabs.

3)the person simiar in age and built, msg me on msn. Almost but not quiet, begging me to talk 2 her.

3 strikes, couldn't say no. Just seem way more than coincidence.

Bukit Indah

Inpromptu trip up north, after work on thursday. I LOVE impromptu trips.

Was a trip that everyone enjoyed themselves heaps and everyone bought something. The shopping was incidential.

Max wanted to do seafood during 1 of the days on this long weekend. Anders proposed tonight. Nic okay it. And so only the 2nd time, 2 cars went in.

Dinner wasn't that filling. Crabs were too small and not that fresh.

asked directions for shopping. guess it was about 10-15 mins away. Managed to do my 130km/hr. That's something that i can't and won't do back home. Too many cars, too much regulations.

Ended up at this new mall in Bukit Indah. Never been there before. Nic,Max,Ailing rank in sales of RM500 or so @ the supermarket. Then Alvin,Ailing and me rank in a bit more for Padini, prolly about RM400.

Then headed to the town center. They actually have this boutique like hotel there! called Europe Rich. Exterior looks good, looks hip. Never thought such places exist in Johor. Had old town. bah. But the road side food next door was fantastic thought abeit oily.

Proposing the next trip in, end of the month. Should skip the seafood place, go directly to the mall. There's A & W. So miss that!

Sunny monkeys

I really don't understand it.

We're virtually strangers. The only link is through a friend. Yet i feel for him. Everytime something happens to him, i feel for him. I hope he's okay. I hope he's got an outlet. I feel his heavyness, i feel his burden, his pain. No we're not soul mates.

Yet on the other hand, I realize/know its pointless. No matter how bad a shape he is. He'll never say, and even if he does, not to me. So why do i even bother.

Yet i can't help but...

4000 cases

i just realize 4000 cases over 5 days of 8 hours each actually works out to 1.5 seconds? mins?/case. wow!

Running Solo

Back to reality, after a week of getaway in Taipei. With no surprise, left on the 26th came back on the 2nd and there it was in my in-tray 26th cases. Thats what one gets for having a not up to par back up. I don't believe he did any cases for me at all. What he did was to give out the 25th cases to the other underwriters. The 25th cases were initially given to him to do.

I'm rendered speechless. Best part i guess, was when i asked him. about cases on the 26th in my in-tray and asked what excatly did he get the rest to do? He couldn't really reply me. His reply was if you need, you ask the rest to help you with the 26th cases. Fuck you!

I'm capable enough to do my own cases. Finished them a little over an hour. Thankfully they weren't too hard and there weren't too many. But that also means that he could have done it in maybe 4 hours? if he wanted to. The last time he was on long leave, I cleared everything nicely for him. It's a word call responsibility.

I will not drown due to the lack of your willingness or ability to help me out. I'm much better than you. I'm a homo fuckin machine for crying out!

Which also means that, doing solo the 4000 SAF cases would be a challenge which i relish and will be able to complete. The inital arrangement was for 1/2 of the underwriters 3, to do them within 2 weeks.

This would be on top of my 2 systems testings that need to be attended to next week as well.